Why the New York Knicks are a complete fraud

People in New York are breathless, and not just because of the recently-arrived cold snap that has accompanied the thicker crowds and gridlock that can only mean the holiday season (for my gift, I'd like another half-hour each day to make sure I get to work on time).

The reason for a lot of this self-induced asphyxiation is the smoking start of New York's favorite winter sons, the New York Knicks. And a lot of the noise coming out of the Garden isn't just coming from the fans.

They are off to a 9-3 start, and 5-0 on their home floor. Carmelo Anthony already has been touted as the NBA's MVP. Mike Woodson and Glen Grunwald are in the discussion to be named Coach and Executive of the Year, respectively. Next thing you know, the Knicks City Dancers will replace the Rockettes at Radio City. We might as well cancel the rest of the season and reserve the Canyon of Heroes right now.

EVERYONE. PLEASE. STOP.

Did I mention the Knicks began play Monday morning 9-3? As in 12 games? As in 12 games of an 82-game NBA schedule? Sure, the Knicks have impressed, and for a team that has not shown much in the way of postseason chops since Pat Riley (and to a lesser extent, Jeff Van Gundy) stalked the sidelines, I'm here to tell you to take it down a notch. Or several.

I'll take it a step further, for the record: The Knicks are a mirage, an apparition, a fraud. You heard it here first: The Nets will finish the regular season with a better record; the Knicks will be hard-pressed to wheeze to the end of the regular season above .500.

Why? The reasons are many. You want to say the Knicks have plenty of veteran experience? That's a diplomatic way of saying they're old -- the oldest team in NBA history on opening night of the season, according to Stats, LLC (32 years, 240 days). Half their roster is comprised of players with 10 or more years in the league (not including Pablo Prigioni, who is classified as a rookie despite being 35 years old). They have eight players 30 or older, five 35 or older, and one -- Kurt Thomas, who is 40.

Rasheed Wallace has already missed two games with a sore foot that won't get any better as the schedule intensifies. Ronnie Brewer already is hobbled with a bad knee. This team is a Jason Kidd rolled ankle and a Tyson Chandler knee sprain away from tumbling to oblivion.

But wait, you say -- the Knicks are getting back Amar'e Stoudemire and Iman Shumpert, who surely will add to the depth of this team.

Well and good, sort of. For one, Stoudemire's best days are long behind him, and you have to wonder how much he'll actually be able to contribute when he does get back on the floor. It's more likely he'll just line up as another casualty in a list that's sure to grow as the season progresses. And by the time Shumpert is cleared to play, there's a good chance the Knicks' season will be in as much ruin as the ancient, creaky guys who wear their uniforms.

It would be impossible for any team -- much less one with as much mileage as this one -- to maintain the torrid pace they've set. A case can be made they've played their best basketball of the season. And the Christmas decorations just went up in midtown. You have to wonder how much love there will be for the Knicks once Valentine's Day rolls around, which should be more than enough time for everyone around here to catch their breath.

Athletes need to think before they tweet. Yeah, right.

There are a lot of things you can do with 140 characters. You can tweak one of the best-known players in the history of your sport. You can go off on a racist, offensive rant about people in your country. You can go on a racist, offensive rant about people from other countries.


And that's just after the first three full days of the Olympic Games in London.


Let's recap, shall we?


First, Hope Solo, the erstwhile America's Darling, morphed into a tweet twit when she called out NBC commentator Brandi Chastain for her analysis during an early-round U.S. women's soccer match in London. Solo thought Chastain was, well, chastising Team USA's play a little too vigorously, saying Chastain should stop criticizing Solo's and the Americans' play "until you get more educated."


"Its 2 bad we cant have commentators who better represents the team&knows more about the game@brandichastain!"


This is the same Chastain who only scored the most significant goal in U.S. women's soccer history to win the 1999 World Cup and raise the sports bra to the national consciousness.


Then there's the case of Greek triple-jumper Voula Papachristou, who on the eve of the biggest moment of her life -- competing in the Olympics -- chose to make a "joke" loosely related to the Greek Olympic team being away for a couple of weeks:


"With so many Africans in Greece ... At least the West Nile mosquitoes will eat home made food!!!"


Stay classy, Athens. This from an athlete representing a country regarded as the home of the modern Olympics. The Greek Olympic Committee made its own subsequent statement, kicking Papachristou off the team "for statements contrary to the values and ideas of the Olympic movement."


The die had clearly been cast, a warning shot across the bow to any other tormented soul in the Olympic Village who might have been thinking about casting similar aspersions toward some other religious, ethnic or opinion-impaired group or person.


But Michel Morganella, a soccer player from Switzerland  -- Switzerland! -- didn't get the memo.


After a 2-1 loss to South Korea, in the true Olympic spirit of sportsmanship, Morganella took to his Twitter feed and banged out this gem, a rough translation courtesy of deadspin.com:


"I will smash all the Koreans, go burn all of you, bunch of retards."


The Swiss have never been to war in their history, but there's a first time for everything.


Olympic athletes aren't alone in their ignorance. Amar'e Stoudemire of the Knicks got into hot water last season for making an anti-gay slur in response to a criticizing fan. Rio Ferdinand, who plays for Manchester United, recently was disciplined by the Football Association for a racially-insensitive tweet toward an opponent. And on and on.


But there is hope the insanity can be stopped. Cincinnati Bengals coach Marvin Lewis -- who had to deal with the antics of the twitter-happy artist formerly known as Chad Ochocinco -- has banned his team from tweeting during training camp, a move other teams in the NFL and other sports should take notice of.


"I don't see how tweeting is going to help us win a football game," Lewis told Yahoo! Sports. "It's not best for our football team to be involved in that. It's best that we just take care of ourselves and not announce what we're doing or not doing, or who did this or who did that, and commenting on what's going on in other sports. Let's be football players."


Or at the very least, think, and look both ways before crossing the tweet.

Not a slam dunk for Celtics

I haven't seen anyone proclaim in print, online or on-screen that the defending Eastern Conference champion Boston Celtics have anything to worry about in their opening-round playoff series against the New York Knicks, which tips off Sunday night.

Far be it for me to offer a dissenting point of view; last June, the Celtics were one victory away from claiming their second NBA championship in three years, and probably would have if not for the injury suffered by Kendrick Perkins (more about that in a minute). Their future Hall-of-Fame Big Three of Kevin Garnett (above), Paul Pierce and Ray Allen looks to be primed for another long postseason run, and the Boston Garden faithful are expecting nothing less.

And Celtics Nation could be given a pass for looking past the Knicks, given that the oftimes-dysfunctional New Yorkers haven't even been to the postseason in the past six years, lost all four regular-season meetings with the C's this season and are defensively- and rebound-challenged ... two areas where the Celtics would appear to have a decided advantage.

Or do they?

Much has been made of the Knicks' offense-first philosophy and their delinquent defensive play. Amar'e Stoudemire and Carmelo Anthony are not exactly recognized as defensive deterrents, certainly not in the same way Garnett is.

Funny, then, when you take a closer look at statistics this season, and notice the Knicks, over the course of the regular campaign, averaged 106.5 points to the Celtics' 96.5 - and here's the grabber - averaged 40.5 boards to Boston's 38.8.

And the rebounding gap between Garnett and Stoudemire? Surprising slim -- Garnett averaged 8.9 rebounds this season to Stoudemire's 8.2.

Folks in Boston have been wringing their hands and beating themselves with chains after the puzzling midseason trade that sent Perkins to Oklahoma City. Perkins not only supplied a defensive presence but an intangible factor that has clearly been missed on the parquet floor.

Now none of this is to suggest I'm picking the Knicks to win -- let's say Celtics in six -- just that there's a good chance success-starved Knicks fans will have roughly one more week to smile and hope before turning their springtime attention fully to the Yankees.

What about the Mets, you say? The less said about them, the better.